I was once a virgin of the all-nighter…I am no more. So if the following is unreadable, looks like it’s written in Sanskrit, or is not in fact about football but rather the allegorical meaning of Cantos VI-XII in Dante’s Inferno I sincerely apologize. With that said, I will attempt to dive into the madness that was week 13. Rex Ryan, care to join me?
1. There isn’t anything else I can add to the “Monday Night Massacre”
But I prefer to let my play do the talking so I’ll try anyway. As much maligned as New York’s defense will be I don’t think anyone was stopping the Patriots last night. Make sure you’re sitting down before you read what’s next, and don’t have any liquid in your mouth…I don’t want you to ruin your computer. But here goes: New England’s 2010 offense may be better than it's 2007 incarnation. Mull on that for a minute in between bouts of raucous laughter. Here’s what the Pats have now: A quarterback who is the best in the business at finding the open man, and a fleet of pass catchers that goes six deep (with no Randy Moss to feed). Every play Brady is finding the open receiver and getting him the ball with pinpoint accuracy. Did you see that pass to Branch for the touchdown? He was being converged on by no less than three defenders. If that ball was a split second late or even a bit off either Branch was getting his head knocked off or the ball was going the other way. Don’t believe me? Consider this: New England’s offensive DVOA (http://www.footballoutsiders.com/) in 2007 season-48.9%. Through 13 weeks of 2010-48.2%. And one more little nugget, no offense dating back to 1993 has had an offensive DVOA ranking higher than 42%...the Patriots are on pace to do it twice. The only way you’re going to stop this offensive unit is getting pressure on Brady, and thus far the Pats have played three teams excellent at creating pressure…they’ve beat all three.
2. The NFL’s erratic enforcement of helmet-to-helmet hits is getting embarrassing
We got a golden example of this sickening inconsistency Sunday night: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nVrNoK5Ab_E&feature=related. I have never seen a more illegal hit in my life. That’s the serious kind of infraction that requires swift and harsh punishment from the league. As of writing this, the exact parameters of McCain’s fine have not been disclosed, but the fact it is merely a fine is enough for me. This is a penalty: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QfS9KQsExgs (sorry for the poor quality) while whacking a completely defenseless receiver helmet to helmet after the play is over is not? Isn’t that precisely the type of play the league (and everyone else) is terrified of? Jameel McClain should have been ejected from the contest, fined, and suspended for a game…that would be called sending a message (unlike endlessly singling out Steeler’s linebacker James Harrison).
3. Green Bay’s throwback uniforms are hideous…
Did this need its own section?-probably not. But did it need to be said?-for the sake of future generations: yes.
4. The Chad Henne dilemma
Miami thought they had their franchise quarterback, they thought they were set for the future…but Henne has done anything but instill hope for the future of the Dolphin’s organization. This is his third season in the league (second one starting), generally a time when quarterbacks take the next step if they ever will. Look at Matt Ryan and Joe Flacco, both in the midst of their third seasons and having the best year of their pro careers. Flacco: 2,988 pass yards, 19 touchdowns, 9 picks, 92.8 rating. Ryan: 2,920 yards, 21 touchdowns, 7 picks, 91.8 rating. In their third seasons Ryan and Flacco have firmly entrenched themselves as elite quarterbacks while Chad Henne is muddling through an extremely disappointing campaign in which he wouldn’t even be starting now if it wasn’t for Chad Pennington suffering a season ending injury. His stats: 2,621 yards, 12 touchdowns, 15 picks, 77.5 rating. There aren’t many excuses you can make for him either. He’s protected by one of, if not the best left tackles in the game in Jake Long, is throwing to Brandon Marshall (three straight 100 catch campaigns) and Davone Bess (has emerged as one of the better slot receivers in the game) and handing the ball off to the tandem of Ronnie Brown and Ricky Williams. The Miami Dolphins organization believed Chad Henne was their guy and spent the big bucks to get him a marquee target…now it looks like they’re back to square one.
5. You didn’t really do that Cincinnati, did you?
As the Saints lined up with 34 seconds to go on the Bengals eight yard line on 4th and four, down three, everyone in the country (and probably some people in Canada) new the Saints were trying to draw Cincinnati offside. Why would a team, needing three points with 30 seconds left on the clock go for it on fourth down? Unless they were playing Peyton Manning (before he thought he could inflate his numbers by throwing touchdowns the opposite way) it just doesn’t happen. That play told me two things: the lineman who committed the neutral zone infraction isn’t a smart football player, or Marvin Lewis is a poor football coach…both are an indictment against the organization. Countless times I’ve seen teams try to do what the Saints did and it never works because professional football players are usually smarter than that…but not Sunday. I guess it figures it was the “Bungles”.
6. This is getting quite ridiculous…
Sorry, I couldn’t resist. You have to understand, it’s been a big couple days for me. Watched the Pats shellack their arch-rivals, got to see Rex’s shell-shocked face after his defense gave up a 45-burger, have been blessed enough to witness the Manning-Brady debate do a 360, pulled my first all-nighter, and even chugged my first keg (I was kidding about one of those…maybe). But really, if you’re as fascinated by Manning’s sudden mediocrity as the rest of the football watching world this is a must-read: http://www.footballoutsiders.com/quick-reads/2010/quick-reads-week-13
7. Patriots-Jets game of the season? Forget about it, try Baltimore-Pittsburgh…
That battle (could you really call it a game?) was awesome, just riveting. In a day full of bad football, America was saved by one of the best contests of the year. I would like to point out that I called the score exactly…except I went with the wrong team. In an offensively focused, air it out type of league that was one of those classic defensive contests that hearkens back to Bears-Raiders days of the seventies and eighties. Didn’t you just know that game was going to whoever made the one big play to seal the deal?...figures it was made by the defense.
Several observations:
a. Everyone loves a high scoring, air it out type of contest but games dominated by strong defensive play can be just as compelling. This game had so many fantastic goal line stands it was hard to keep track.
b. Terrell Suggs was INCREDIBLE. He’ll be remembered for that failed sack against Roethlisberger (more on that later) but don’t forget how he dominated that game. How’s this for a line: five tackles, 1.5 sacks, 5 quarterback hits, and 3 tackles for a loss. He seemed to be involved in nearly every play, too bad he wasn’t the one to break Roethlisberger’s nose (to be politically correct: just kidding).
c. Speaking of that near-sack by Suggs, that’s one of the greatest plays I’ve seen all year…it reminded me of Eli Manning’s great escape in the 2007 Super Bowl…except better. There isn’t another QB in the league who could get away from a 250 pound linebacker as he was draped on his body. Sure Big Ben doesn’t treat women that great, and he might not be the greatest pocket passer ever, but you have to marvel at his ability to stay upright and create a play out of nothing.
d. Troy Polamalu isn’t having his greatest season, but you have to admire what a game changing force he can be. Despite that, how did the Ravens let that strip-sack happen? It wasn’t a deftly disguised blitz; he was right at the line of scrimmage. And Polamalu, being one of the best defensive players of the decade, wouldn’t you think Baltimore would have him accounted for at all times? It’s not like he’s hard to miss, bouncing curly black locks’ and all…
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